You know the days I’m talking about Mommas. The ones when all you do is scold your children, or at least it feels that way. They are the days when you look around your house and feel as if you will never get caught up with all the laundry, or picking up toys scattered in every nook and cranny. The days you are constantly running late and just can’t seem to get it together. Perhaps, you didn’t have your best moment when you lost it in the grocery store check out line because the incessant whining for candy finally got to you. We all have those days. Needless to say, mom-hood is not all sunshine and rainbows. However, I’ve got some things for you to do to beat the mom guilt and frustration, and get you back to knowing that you are more than enough for your children, and a bad day is just a bad day.
The balance of mom life.
Do you know what’s the worst thing for me? It’s like the catalyst that triggers a bad mom day. It’s the thing that can turn my whole day into an anxiety filled mess. That thing is if we have a bad morning before school. Ugh, I fear mornings like that. Normally I have a pretty good and set schedule. My alarm goes off at 5 AM and I work at my computer from then until 6:45. I spend 15 minutes getting myself ready and at 7 AM I wake my kids. Big boys are out the door at 7:45 AM for junior high, and the rest of us load up the car at 8:20 AM to head to the elementary.
Mom life chaos despite habit.
Despite having become quite a creature of habit as I try and balance all of my mom duties with my workload, there are mornings that I don’t get up with my alarm. I wake a half hour behind schedule (because I always set a second alarm at 5:30 AM, just in case). At 6:45 AM I’m still in the middle of something on my computer so at 7 AM when I wake my kids, I also still have myself to get ready.
It never fails that on that particular morning I would obviously be running low on groceries (it’s like Murphy’s law), so I have no idea what I am packing my kids for school lunches. My daughter throws a fit over the first three outfit choices that I give her, and I burn the toast….twice. Since toddlers don’t dress themselves, unless you are raising a prodigy, mine is still running around in his pajamas two minutes before we have to leave. We finally get in the car, miraculously only 8 minutes late, until I realize the toddler has a dirty diaper.
After a record breaking time in diaper changing we finally drive out of our neighborhood. Then, my son realizes he has left his homework folder on the table. Sigh.
That’s not all….
Now 14 minutes later than usual we arrive at school at the peak of the drop off rush hour. I don’t think I need to tell you, but trying to make your way through school traffic in the morning can be brutal. If its on a morning that hasn’t exactly gone so well I’m one ounce away from unleashing my road rage mom monster, and getting out of the car to reprimand the mom who thinks its okay to double park her car and get out to walk her kids up to school, blocking traffic both ways. For the record, it’s not okay.
The aftermath.
After a morning such as that I spend the rest of my day trying to get a handle on life. I can’t think straight, I feel rushed, and as if I need at least 4 extra hours in my day to make up for the 30 minutes that slipped away from me at the beginning of it.
How to recover…
Whatever your trigger may be to launch you into a bad mom day, we all have them on occasion. So if you find yourself spinning out of control, or feeling guilty, or wondering what God was thinking when he decided to give you these little people to raise, take heart. On those days, try one (or all) of these things to lift yourself up again and put you back on the right, crazy beautiful track in your mom life.
7 Ways to Turn Your Bad Mom Days Around
#1 Get some perspective.
Remember that your bad day is only one day and not the end of the world. Most likely the things that are getting you down aren’t even that big of a deal. It’s just that they came at the wrong time and all too close together, like the perfect storm. No matter what, you need to allow yourself grace, hug your kiddos, and know that you will all start over again tomorrow.
And guess what? This is just a stage in life. All too fast it will be gone. And these days that seem so tough, will be ones that you long for again.
Read our post written just for moms: There Will Be Those Days
#2 Watch this music video.
The first time I listened to this song from Nicole Nordeman was at a Mother’s Day church service. They put the YouTube video up on the big screens and I don’t think there was a dry mom eye in the house. I’m pretty sure even some of the dads were crying. Since then I share it with fellow mothers every single Mother’s Day to remind us all how special our calling as a mom is.
#3 Take a break.
Sometimes the thing you need the most is to just take a break. Yes, you are actually allowed that as a mom. It might take a little doing, like possibly enlisting your spouse to watch the kids for an hour, or calling up your sitter to come over while you go do something for you. Even if its just heading to the grocery store alone. If those aren’t options for you then put a movie on for your kids, and take a breather in your bedroom or out on your patio while you use screen time to your advantage. Your kids aren’t going to fry too many brain cells in one sitting and you’ll be a better mom for giving yourself what you need to regroup.
#4 Crank up some music.
You know what music I’m talking about, girl. The kind that you just can’t stop your body from moving to. Maybe its a little JT that gets you going (who doesn’t he get going?). If hip hop is your thing then connect it to your bluetooth speaker. Country? Rap? Techno? Or maybe you like to throw it back a little and turn up the volume on a top 90s playlist. I mean, a little Whitney Houston, I Want to Dance with Somebody, will get anyone on the dance floor. Even if that dance floor happens to be in your kitchen.
#5 Call another mom.
When you feel like you might be at your wit’s end one of the best ways to boost your mood is to connect with someone who gets it. Call, text, or go visit one of your besties and let off some steam about your bad day. Sometimes verbally releasing that negative energy is enough to help you to let go and move on.
#6 Focus on faith.
Take some time to calm your nerves through a daily devotional or prayer. You may have already talked to the big man upstairs about giving you extra patience that day, but I don’t think it will hurt to put in a request for peace as well.
You can listen to a podcast like, Focus on the Family Parenting Podcast. Or listen to your favorite pastor or spiritual leader give a sermon. Many local churches have an online video collection or YouTube is full of great ones.
#7 Have a laugh.
Sometimes laughter is the best medicine. So I put together a list of hilarious mom quotes for you to read. When I was deciding which quotes to include in my post I was literally laughing out loud. Go ahead and click on over to let off some steam through laughter and lighten the mood of your bad mom day.
Some other ideas are to watch your favorite episode of Friends, or which ever comedy you love. Have your kids tell you jokes. Or, watch these two YouTube moms and their comedic take on all things mom life
Tomorrow is Another Mom Day
I once heard someone say, “there are big things in life, and then there is all the rest”. Most of what we stress over and allow ourselves to get worked up about fall into the latter category. However, in the moment our emotions get the best of us and take control, turning a perfectly good day into a bad one. In the grand scheme of our life that one moment or collection of moments, or that one bad day isn’t going to determine our weeks, or months, or years.
Chances are the good far outweighs the bad. Chances are someone else is having a worse day than you. And chances are that another moment will come along in your mom day that is so sweet it will wash away anything that had you feeling down. After that, there is always tomorrow. <3
I absolutely love this article and the way you tell a story! Yes, having a rough morning can totally ruin the day. Another great tip I would add to this is to have your kids pack their own lunches and get themselves up 😉 It’s been SO life changing for all of us. They feel empowered and I don’t feel like I’m running around like a crazy person getting stressed. (They’ve been doing this since Kinder!). All of your other tips are spot on and I’m sure will help so many mamas. Perspective and faith. Nailed it! 🙂
Aw, thanks so much!!! That is some great advice and seriously a huge accomplishment for your kids to be so independent! I’m going to start that!